So I had this surgery yesterday. I got there early and waited about an hour while I read this really cool article about Tony Joe White that my friend (Webb Wilder, bless his heart) had sent me. Then, even though this was out-patient surgery, I still had to be prepped like real surgery. I answered a million questions, got into a "gown," had a warm blanket (really warm - it had been heated) placed over me (it was really cold in the pre-op room), got an IV and a tap, and waited and waited and waited. I started getting really nervous cause I've never had any surgery, and I asked Buzz, "Do you think it's too late to chicken out?" He thought a minute and said, "Well, you could rip your IVs out, and I could commandeer and drive the bed and if we race we might make it to the parking lot." I thought about this and then decided that I'd probably just have to come back later and they'd be upset with me. So they gave me a little sedative and I finally went into the OR. I've never been in an OR except on TV. There were lots of bright lights and people and equipment and monitors and KNIVES (which I didn't see but I knew they were there). So I got a shot which did not put me to sleep but put me in a better mood, and they put this curtain between my arm and my face so I couldn't see anything which was fine with me. I could hear them talking, and the radio was playing music (could not tell you what though). They put this tourniquet just below my elbow on my left arm and tightened it - really tight so that my fingers felt like Bluto's right after he's hit Popeye. You know how they throb! I pictured them with an ice pick stabbing my arm repeatedly to see if I flinched, but I didn't feel the surgery. THANK GOD! It's over very quickly and I'm moved to the Recovery Room where I got water, crackers, and a pain pill! I thanked everyone for EVERYTHING and even gave the doctor a CD!

So then I came home and took my pills every four hours to sleep. And I dreamed and dreamed and dreamed. I dreamed this dream that I have quite often which is usually a very pleasant dream. In my dream I have built a house on a lot of land that I have, and it is a great big huge house which rambles all over the countryside. It has lofts, and giant ballrooms, and apartments, and stores, and swimming pools and balconeys (all in one house!), but it needs yardwork. Also there is a huge barn with all my animals in it. Now this all sounds very expensive but in my dream it is all affordable and normal except that all the neighbors (who seem to be like the Darlings on the Andy Griffith Show) think it's amazing. I have partially furnished it and filled it full of stuff but for some reason we are not living in it. But I go to visit it. It's almost like I forget about it and then suddenly remember it and go there and wonder why in the world we don't live in it. Well last night in my dream I went there and there were teenagers camping out in it. They were burning cds from my collection. I was nice to them but said that they should come by invitation. Then I heard someone else and there was an aerobics class going on in another room. And then in came about twenty or thirty people led by four uniformed policemen. I asked them what was going on and one policeman said that this was the best place they had found to conduct their training mission (?). So I'm nice for awhile and then explain to everyone that THIS IS A PRIVATE RESIDENCE and they can come back by INVITATION! So they all sort of apologize (more and more people have come in) and leave but in a few minutes they're all back! Then Webb Wilder (who just appears in his rock n roll clothes) tells me that we have to hurry to get to our gig in Jackson, and that if we leave right now we'll still be two hours late. So we jump in his car (and the teenagers come with us) and drive on these narrow country roads until we drive off into a mud hole. Webb!!!! Webb, the teenagers, and I swim around the car for awhile (actually we can stand up cause it's not deep), and then I woke up.

All my stories begin in the past tense and somewhere take on the present tense. I think this is because I study screenwriting where everything takes place in the present (as you watch it).

I'm going to eat fried chicken now.